I went to the doctor last night after becoming miserably ill from a sickness that plagues our society. I misunderstood what I was being tested for and when she explained the cost, I questioned it just for clarity. Out of habit, I put out my hands to put her at ease that I was not disputing the cost. What if I had accidentally brushed up against her lab coat?

Would a rational person fire back with a look of scorn saying, “Don’t touch me!”?

If I were simply trying to explain a concern, wouldn’t a sensible person account for that information in order to accurately assess the situation? Wouldn’t you expect a witness to do the same? What about the clinic and others who came into it? Would they act as objective observers in the interest of truth (and consider the state of mind of their employee)?

What if the employee’s got an attitude problem? What if they’re unhappy and hate their job — and just seized on the moment to take it out on someone else? What if they already had a victim mentality and wanted to make it official by becoming a victim? Then again, what if they really did have something happen to them? What if they really are a victim — and that’s why they’re unhappy? What if her reaction has nothing to do with the comfort-craving culture I can’t stand?

It’s possible! Lemme tell ya what’s not possible:

Humanity — when you allow the atmosphere of the world around you to poison the possibility of understanding one tiny moment that went wrong within it.

Arrival is a movie that makes you think — and that’s a gift that keeps on giving. Their efforts to develop a conduit of communication are in striking contrast to how we talk to each other today. With the word “HUMAN” written on a whiteboard, they were able to build on that by seeing patterns in indecipherable symbols.

We have the most sophisticated communication tools in history — and we can’t even talk to each other in the same language. That’s because I’m talking in a language that recognizes that the claim below is demonstrably false (at least it was when “demonstrably” meant something).

It was a time when a lot of things that once meant something, now mean nothing.

We have different definitions of “unparalleled”: Mine is based in reality (as in the universally understood demands required to warrant such a claim). They have other ideas — where The Presentation of reality is reality. A lot of that goin’ around!

I’d see that it had a certain panache. That’s what I’m good at, not the work, not the work — the presentation!

That’s all the more fitting when you realize that the story I’m about to tell you — all boils down to people repeatedly failing to deliver on their fundamental duties (creating an atmosphere in which shoddiness is acceptable in the newfangled fashions of “unparalleled”).

And this bit below is just priceless. “We love our residents!” As a fed-up freedom fighter for restroom rights — I wasn’t feeling the love by being locked out of what I pay a pretty penny for. Access to the bathrooms comes with the deal (just as if they were the gym or any other amenity). But from the get-go when new ownership took over last year — they showed their true colors (and compromise wasn’t one of ’em). Not to mention the bare minimum of management skills to make damn sure you don’t inconvenience your residents any more than absolutely necessary in the pursuit of fancy features nobody really cares about but them.

If it’s between bathroom access and sprucing up the place with new carpet and a paint job, I’d take the former every time and twice on Sunday. But nobody asked me what I wanted — because the latter is the illusion of love (a.k.a. The Presentation). The carpeting isn’t about current residents — it’s the love for reeling in new ones.

I get that — it’s a business. And lo and behold, that’s what this ultimately is all about.

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my rent = services rendered: that’s the deal!

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One night I came out of the pool and was stunned to find the restroom was locked. I’d been here over 6 years and outside of maintenance matters — I’ve never seen that happen a single time. Now, it was happening all the time. Why would anyone do that? What’s more, why wasn’t I notified? Even if an email went out and I missed it — something like this calls for some fliers to inform us of their latest expression of everlasting love.

How about showing a little love by explaining your rationale for locking ’em after business hours? Apparently, it’s about some security concerns. Well, life comes with inherent risks in living it. When I came out one day to discover my catalytic converter was cut off my car, I didn’t go crying to the office about their lapse in security. I dropped a grand to get a new one and that was the end of it. I got lucky a few years ago when windows were bashed in, but had I been among the unfortunate — I would have replaced what was broken and moved along.

These people have no such notion, as there is no rhythm and flexibility in how they operate. There is no reflection upon their pursuits and how they should prioritize and manage them (including managing expectations). If their plan is to implement an automatic-unlock mechanism via an app — and they’re locking the doors until it’s done: If you’re saying it’s a few months away and you’re looking into various vendors and whatnot, I’ll give you my patience and benefit of the doubt to boot. Regardless of how flat-out wrong it is to deny us the services we are due — I’m flexibile and gracious enough to give you the time to do it your way. But you’ve gotta give me something in return:

You better make goddamn sure they’re unlocked during the day!

A friend and former colleague once said, “Rick’s the type of guy who would lose his job on principle.” I’ve damn near burned my career on it, but that’s another story. When I politely raised my concerns about locking the bathrooms, I rarely used ’em at the time (except after a swim). But the principled part of me was thinking of those drinking water at the gym (and how annoying it would be to interrupt a workout to hit the head back home). Chances are, they would alter their intake in order to avoid that. Or perhaps they stuck with their water routine and just held it in.

Either way, you’re screwing with someone’s workout — and for the life of me, I can’t find the love in that.

But what I found most incredible was the cavalier attitude of the head honcho when I mentioned the emergency scenario. I wasn’t thinking about someone really needing to go, but rather the need of water in some emergency (perhaps at the pool). The way she blew off any notion of the possibility of an emergency situation just astounded me. As she clearly wasn’t concerned — I didn’t even bother explaining what I was getting at.

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On that fancy new app “in a few months” — that ship sailed months ago.

And still, my patience endured (but was wearing thin). Between their clubhouse clock-lock with a mind of its own (and the multiple times I found the restrooms locked during the day): There’s only so much love I could take. I let it go, but there was bound to be a day when they tried my patience one too many times. And by the way, when someone with exceptional attention to detail — laughs out loud at this ludicrous claim below, I suggest you take a long, hard look in the mirror:

When showing the place, you think these people tell prospective tenants:

There’s the bathrooms. You can’t use ’em after hours, but feel free during the day (that is if you’re lucky and we remember to unlock them).

What unparalleled universe are you living in where “every detail considered”: Doesn’t include communicating to your employees that it’s of paramount importance not to exacerbate a problem by rubbing salt in the wound of your loved ones?

We took away their cups to go green. We locked the restrooms to protect them (when we all know it’s actually about protecting the company). We tell them we love them but of course we don’t mean it. Nevertheless, to keep up appearances in The Presentation — make sure to take care of the little things so we don’t expose the big things. We’re behind on the app implementation, so it’s all the more critical to come through on unlocking those doors each day. So the first thing you do when you arrive — is unlock those bathrooms.

The key commitment in that command would have averted what was about to blow.

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And the irony is that when it blew — it wasn’t about the bathrooms anymore. I wasn’t even all that angry about it (just intensely annoyed — and I wanted to convey this concern to the employee on duty). It was her responsibility to unlock them, but I don’t really care about some low-level employee’s lackluster work ethic in this half-assed operation. It was bad enough that the one by the gym was locked in early afternoon, but even the one by the office was as well. For crying out loud, it’s right outside the door: You couldn’t even come through on that much in professing your love for us?

And by the way, it seems like a task more in line with maintenance to me. A customer-facing person should not be responsible for unlocking doors (as they could easily get caught up with a customer and forget). That doesn’t excuse anyone, but it sets them up for failure and frustrated tenants — and that, is not smart.

Someone who “considers every detail” would know that!

Just as any rational person would be able to size up the situation when someone’s trying to tell you that this is not about you (and they’re not upset at you). And if they put out their hands to put your mind at ease while saying so (and brushed by your jacket by accident): “Don’t touch me” laced with a look of scorn — seems wildly over-the-top. At least it used to be, but no longer: As Anything Goes in a world where turbocharged hypersensitivity has become normalized.

And catered to like you just crawled out of the crib.

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Life at the Bottom: How fitting for the folly of our times. And now, my issue is with her (and everyone like her — male and female).

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She struck a nerve — as I know a little something about how far people will go to comfort their fragile egos (without an atom of regard for the damage they do). Do you really believe that girl would have snapped back like that had it been a female had done the same? And if you’re thinking, “It’s not the same” — you’re not thinking! It’s not about being “the same” — it’s about objectively examining the situation. For instance, what if a female touched me (accidentally or otherwise)?

Are you telling me there aren’t women who kick the crap out of me with ease?

I’m sure Ronda Rousey would have something to say about that (along with countless millions of women with superior strength and/or skills). If one of ’em put their hands on me in an exchange — would I be justified in calling the cops simply because I felt threatened? Or should that feeling require some minimal foundation to be established? Yeah, they could kick my ass — but in that moment, did they act like they were going to? And shouldn’t there be some sense of mutual responsibility for what’s going on in the situation? Perhaps an allowance for mistakes made by all parties involved?

Perhaps some middle ground: Where you get to your address your concerns while simultaneously addressing mine?

Look, I’m sorry I forgot to unlock the restrooms — it won’t happen again. And while I know what you were trying to do (and I understand it was an accident): Please don’t touch me again. But I will follow up with the office on Monday about your concerns and see about the status on the app implementation.

And that — is the mark of humanity!

So instead of acting like someone who just tried to comfort you — just assaulted you: You’ve stood your ground, but rose to the occasion by recognizing your role in the situation and the justifiable concerns of the customer (and set the stage for follow-up). This outfit has no such notion — and that became clear from the get-go on getting rid of the coffee cups to go green. That fiasco is shared in the first story in this saga — “When the Machine Has Taken the Soul from the Man”: The Broadstone Chronicles.

As with waiting on the restrooms for their lockdown to protect the people — on the cups I came with compromise and patience (despite my disgust over it all). I solved the problem by buying my own boxes of cups and creamers. And that would have been the end of it had someone not stolen my cup on the very first day I stashed one. I didn’t care about the cup — I was pissed that I gotta jump through hoops on this horseshit while putting up with her delightfully dismissive emails on the matter.

This is no middle ground with these people — and then this “encouragement” crap with the sign charade. I think I got the picture when it might as well read:

We encourage you to use your favorite mug: Pay no mind to the fact that we’re no longer providing any cups, so you have no choice.

Lotsa love, Broadstone

If you’re gonna come in here and badmouth the previous company to elevate yourselves, shoddiness and shady practices should not come with the program. That saga with the sign may not say much to most people, but it speaks volumes to me. Just like it took of all of 10 seconds to size up the character of a person implying I assaulted her while attempting to put her at ease.

Knowing what I know about people like that — it all came rushing back to me in an instant. What kind of world do you want to live in where what you feel and percieve is the truth simply because you’re entitled to believe it? Where is the quest to sharpen your senses in the willingness to wonder whether or not you should feel that way? That maybe you got it wrong — by injecting the atmosphere of the world around you (thereby clouding the picture of what was right in front of you).

And is how she feels all that matters? What about what I’ve been through? What about how I’ve been wronged by people willing to wield such power without conscience? And what about the cocoon around her that let her get away with it — just like you did! It is now as it was then: About something else! That’s why you conflated the coffee cup incident with this one. To be sure, I really tore into the manager over that ordeal (with witnesses all around — male and female).

But nobody made a move, nobody called the cops, and we’ve been fine ever since.

Why wasn’t I in breach of my lease for unloading on her? She took it like a champ (far better than most men could). And in so doing, she earned my respect (despite my ongoing frustrations with this place). There was no need to get that angry again at this group, as we’d been down that road. And there was especially no reason to get upset with someone I’ve never even been angry about (or given much thought to at all).

But the second she pulled that stunt — it turned into something else.

And this crew with the cops were so preoccupied with filling out their forms with foregone conclusions (an investigation that entirely hinges on how she felt): That nowhere in the minds did they question whether or not she should feel that way. It just astounds me that people who should know better — seem oblivious to how someone’s state of mind factors into a situation. And are you telling me that simply by virtue of a witness taking her side — that’s it, it must be true? I’m sure the atmosphre of America and her being a woman had nothin’ to do with it. Never mind that I’m the one who said, “You’re a witness to this!” (so obivously I wasn’t concerned and welcomed her testimony, just as I hoped for video footage).

And somehow I think my questions for her would be different than theirs. Did you ask her how early into this exchange the touching took place? Did you ask her if he said anything when it happened? And if so, what? If both the victim and the witness couldn’t tell you a single thing I said, what would that tell you? Maybe they did (I haven’t seen the report). But I did not get the impression from the police that they were pursuing what really happened. As they stood right in my living room acting like the touching was the end all be all, why would I? That aside, they were very nice to me.

By the way, if she felt so threatened — why’d she stand for 10 minutes after the touching took place? I don’t really know if it was that long, but it felt like it.

Yeah, yeah. But your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could — that they didn’t stop to think if they should.